{The One About Daycare}

Until an hour ago, I had this post planned word for word.   Then, there was the car ride from hell. 

Rowan started daycare yesterday.  A wonderful little in home babysitter with just a handful of kids.  It's great.  Seriously, Row loves it there.  In fact, last week the hubs and I took him to visit/ meet the other kids and both times we walked through the door and he took off, ignoring us and loving them.  He cried hysterically when we left.  The second time he leaped from our arms to his teacher and hung on to her neck.  He hasn't cried once the past two days when being dropped off.  He eats his whole lunch AND snacks!  He takes a two hour afternoon nap. In a crib. Without being rocked. Jiminy frickin Christmas, he isn't my kid.  He's a better kid.  He's a better man for being at daycare.  Enter me, the brokenhearted momma.  Of course, I want my son to be happy.  Of course, I want him to socialize and love the people who care for him.  I WANTED to get back to work.  But, I mean, couldn't he at least miss me a little.  I'm like last weeks news.  I'm chopped liver.  I'm Michelle after Kelley and Beyonce went solo. 

Part II:  The Car Ride From Hell

So, then, tonight happened.  We had dinner with friends in Indy (Indianapolis for the Indiana cornfield illiterate of you) to meet their sweet baby and catch up.  Every time I went near the baby Row screamed.  He gave my girlfriend and the little nugget the meanest, analytical looks all night.  He refused to sit in his highchair and would only stop crying if he was sitting in my lap, or on the floor clinging to my feet.  He was a piece of work. Clingy, clingy work.  The kind of work that makes you sweat from someone else trying to exist in the space you are taking up in the universe.  CLINGY.  But that was the good part of the night.  On the way home he threw a tantrum for 45 minutes straight.  It was so intense he projectile vomited, TWICE.  The whole time he just held his arms out to me screaming mamamamama.  Again, enter me, heartbroken.  I finally got him to sleep by basically sitting on the arm of his car seat, both arms wrapped around him, kissing his forehead, and shushing in his ear.  Although it hurt me to see him so sad.  It was nice to be the only one in the world he wanted, to be needed and loved. 

I'm glad he loves his day home away from home.  I'm really, really glad he still loves me most.  This parenting rollercoaster never ceases to amaze me. 

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{A New Year}

I don't put much faith in fate.  I don't believe in meant to be's or master plans.  However, I was clearly destined to be a teacher. 

I get the same kind of rush each August that most people only experience January first.  There is just something so refreshing and innocent about the start of Fall and the back to school banter that fills the air.  I love redecorating my classroom.  I fill my head with goals and high ideals I know I'll probably never achieve.  I am introduced to a hundred and twenty new faces that will fill my days.  Likely, those faces with be accompanied by quite a few new challenges too.  It's my New Year because its a time for renewal and fresh starts.  Also, by the time January rolls around, I'm half way to a 3 month vacation.  Furthermore, I find Fall heavenly. 

This year, however, it is going to be bittersweet.

Rowan will be starting daycare soon.  We avoided it last year but this year there was no choice.  I know daycare is wonderful.  Honestly, I worked in one for years and know all of the benefits.  Furthermore, my child needs boundaries and routine like the desert needs the rain.  Neither of which I am great at providing.  Also, I am not cut out to be a stay at home momma.  I admire those of you who do, but I couldn't.  I love my son too much to make him spend his days stuck with a mother who is secretly longing to be elsewhere.  I love my son, but right now, I want to experience other things in addition to that love.  I need to feel fulfilled outside my home, in my career, in myself.  I am a better mother for some time away.  He is a better child for the chance to be exposed to other fantastic people and playmates.

Still though, it makes me a wee bit sad. 

So, we are spending the next two weeks the only way I know how, doing the only thing I've ever done -- preparing to go back to school.  We are cherishing our last full days together.  I'm getting my school supplies and classroom ready.  Rowan is getting a new lovey and crayons.  We are getting new school clothes and shoes.  And, I am reminding myself that Rowan is getting to share in one of my favorite past times.

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{3 Months}

This month, R:
*Laughs all the time
*Has a 500 Watt smile that melts his momma's heart and rarely leaves his face
*Is starting to tolerate tummy time
*Still has zero interest in rolling over but loves to rotate himself
*Does a great job holding his head up
*Really, really wants to sit up but just can't quite make it happen yet
*Sticks his tongue out constantly, unless his mouth is too busy being filled by his hands
*Love, love, loves his crinkle book and nomming on Sophie
*Only wakes up once a night, usually
*Successfully sleeps unswaddled in his crib
*Swats at the toys hanging over his playmat
*Uses his fingers to pinch, grabs momma's necklaces, and softly tugs hair
*Stares longingly at our food and can't wait to eat something other than formula
*Is demonstrating all of his momma's sass and daddy's sense of humor








R is available for any of your modeling needs. He is well versed in the arts of facial expression.

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Your dreams were your ticket out, Welcome back...

E and I started this blog nearly a year ago as a place to share our lives. Little did we know that before we would even become accustomed to updating it regularly (see the pathetic attempt at frequent blogging below) our lives were going to change faster than we could type. Of course, I am talking about the sweet little boy who is attempting to help me type as I speak. So, the goal of blogging was replaced with nursery paint, home improvements and all things nesting. Now that R is here our lives are so much fuller, so different, yet so improved. We now hope that this blog can serve as a place to document the little moments and big milestones we have already found to be so fleeting.

Speaking of the little moments, I also plan to spend this year striving to be a better photographer so I will be participating in "Project 365". Each day, all year, I will take at least one photo and will be posting them here throughout the week to document our lives.

10/365

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